The Real Reason For Impostor Syndrome — Even After You Learn to Code
How to Finally Stop Feeling Like a Fraud in Tech (Even if You’re Late to the Game)
I'm going to explain how to stop feeling like an impostor—even if you’re self-taught, mid-career, and surrounded by 25-year-olds with CS degrees.
You want to feel like you belong. Like you’re credible. Like you didn’t waste years in the wrong job.
And in tech, where everyone seems younger, faster, or more experienced… that feeling can be hard to find.
“I’ll never catch up”
“I’ll never be that good”
Sound familiar?
Unfortunately, impostor syndrome isn’t cured by more skill.
It’s cured by better signal and self-concept alignment.
The real cause of impostor syndrome isn’t your lack of skill. It’s your lack of career narrative.
Here’s what makes it worse:
Reason #1: You compare your backstage to someone else’s highlight reel. You measure how you feel on the inside against how they appear on the outside.
Reason #2: You think getting one more certificate will finally make you “valid” – in their eyes.
Reason #3: You don’t know how to explain your strengths in technical terms because your “transferable skills” sounds like you’re hoping they agree…
Reason #4: You’ve don’t actually know someone else personally that made this change, and everyone around you thinks you’re insane —and that erodes belief
But there’s a way to reclaim your identity and own your new path.
Step 1: Create a transformation narrative.
Your story isn’t “I used to be X, now I want to be Y.” That creates doubt. Instead, show the through-line: by doing XYZ, it is inevitable that I will achieve my goal…it’s just matter of time and focus.
Step 2: Practice like a professional, not a hobbyist.
Stop trying to “feel ready” and start solving real problems. Build momentum through small wins in messy environments—exactly how real dev teams work. Devs at the workplace aren’t doing tutorials. They’re building things in ambiguity. By figuring things out. You should practice exactly that.
Step 3: Get someone to believe in you before you can believe in you
Belief is contagious. If your circle doesn't reflect who you're becoming, you’ll stay stuck in who you’ve been. This is why in the Inner Circle Mentorship Program Brian and I accelerate growth - we immerse you in people who make you feel normal. And we believe in you well before you start to believe in yourself.
Remember – You don’t need to feel like an engineer. You just need to be like one and do the things they do. The feeling will follow.
👉 Follow the podcast here: YouTube | Spotify
👉 Learn more about the Inner Circle coaching program here: https://parsity.io/inner-circle
Three ways we can help you:
1. Wondering what learning to code actually means?
Becoming a coder is much more than just "learning to code" some languages. When I got hired at Google, for example, I didnt know 3 out of the 4 languages I had to write every day.
Check out
My FreeCodeCamp Course --> Before You Learn To Code (Video).
Updated version (including Google and other big tech experiences)
2. Inner Circle (Free Preview Included)
Our personalized, intensive mentorship program designed to help career changers go from zero to software developer—and actually get hired. It’s not for everyone, but if you’re ready to commit, we’ll walk with you every step.
Preview the Inner Circle Program -> free preview.
Apply for Inner Circle → parsity.io/inner-circle
3. Dev30
Want to learn the basics, but not quite ready for the Parsity Inner Circle? No problems - Try the Dev30 challenge!
It’s our 30-day JavaScript sprint focused on building real projects, learning in public, and creating a network in tech.
Join dev30 → dev30.xyz
